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It is a few minutes past 5am and I am practicing my daily transcendental meditation. However, I can't complete it. It usually takes about 25mins to 30mins. Barely 5mins into it, the discomfort around my left chest has forced me to stop.
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I stopped and started observing the sounds coming from there. I could hear my heart beat loudly and faster than normal. I could also hear the movement of liquid from the region, at the same time feeling an expansion and a burning sensation.
I have never had such a weird experience and I was terrified. I knew why. I thought to myself, this time with glossy eyes: what have I been doing to myself?
Let me take you to the beginning. I started smoking weed back in 2020 during COVID-19 lockdown. I stopped in 2021, and somehow got back at it last year. Then I stopped again early on this year for a few months and found my way back in March. Yes, ours was a toxic relationship!
Within April and May of this year, I had started a daily practice of meditation in the morning, before sunrise. One beautiful day, like every other day, I stumbled on a video of Ray Dalio whom I consider my role model, talking about transcendental meditation and how it has brought him tremendous success in his over 30 years career in finance and investing. His asset management firm, Bridgewater Associates is the largest hedge fund in the world, with over 123 billion USD in assets under management (AUM).
I graduated from normal meditation to the type Ray Dalio talked about. I would only do this after smoking, daily. My typical day was: smoke, meditate, go about the day's chores and activities, smoke some more if I had the chance. If I didn't have the chance, I would create it of course. Smoke in the evening before my evening meditation, usually before or during sunset. I had to smoke before each meditation exercise. I was pretty consistent, lol. I'd smoke before every meal too, at least most of the time.
Everything changed the day I heard my heart beat loudly. Out of fear of damaged lungs, I talked to my sister who is a medical doctor and I visited the hospital. Her boss examined me and told me he couldn't find anything, that my lungs were fine and asked if I would do a chest x-ray. I could still feel the discomfort while he was examining me. I had a glimmer of hope when said my lungs were fine, I was not expecting that. He would go on to schedule an appointment for a chest X-ray the following day and recommend some medicine for heart palpitations. I left to discuss some more with my sister.
My sister educated me on the harm smoking does to the body, as if I didn't already know. No, I didn't. What stood out for me in the discussion was: smoking increases bad cholesterol in the body and reduces the good cholesterol which the body needs. While some people are fast metabolizers, others are slow metabolizers and you wouldn't know which category you fall into. This, alongside one's genetic composition explains why a chain smoker, who is now in their 80s could still be smoking. When the bad cholesterol builds up, it can occlude your blood vessels which can lead to heart problems.
She recommended lifestyle modification, which is a whole spectrum. It includes but not limited to stopping a particular harmful habit, exercise, rest and the place of food. Take more Potassium containing fruits, include more vegetables, reduce intake of salt and processed foods, take nuts and pay attention to the oil used in cooking. There are many things that can cause palpitations, anxiety is one. I was not anxious. I neglected my wellness, indulged in harmful habit and did not exercise.
"Let's imagine you have an organ failure and you have the money for a transplant, there is no guarantee it will work. You could be fine for a while, but your body might attack the organ later on, considering it a foreign body", she continued.
"All those things won't help you. If at this age you are developing heart palpitations..." I didn't hear anything she said further. There and then, I realized how I had messed up my life. I guess I fucked around and found out.
Before I left home to the hospital, I trashed the spliff I had lit and my stash of weed. Wrote my next line of actions. For the last time, I quit smoking that morning before the doctors advised me to. I have lost count of how many times I quit smoking in the past.
To everyone I have ever shared a blunt with, thank you for tbe good old days. It was fun while it lasted.
Next week, I will write on my daily routine of brisk walk which I started the following day and have continued to this morning.
Food for Thought:
Take care of your body. It's the only place you have to live.
A PICTURE IS WORTH A THOUSAND WORDS
Just because I miss watching sunrise and sunset. When was the last time you watched either of them? I have not seen this beauty in many weeks due to weather.
FAVE TWEET OF THE WEEK
FAVE ARTICLE OF THE WEEK
Potassium: Potassium is an essential mineral that is needed by all tissues in the body. It is sometimes referred to as an electrolyte because it we a small electrical charge that activates various cell and nerve functions.
MEME FACTORY
That is all, folks. 👋 Enjoy your weekend (in President Tinubu’s voice), and I'll see you again next week.
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